Monday, 3 April 2006

Last night thoughts that I can't get away from
Mood:  hug me
My age has snuck up on me...When I think of myself I think of myself as young and that I am not. My body is failing me and I can no longer do the thing that I wish that I could do. I may wish that there was a young handsome stud in my bed but I would not know what to do with him if he were there(maybe). I may wanted to go and trample the wild country but I would not last very long out there. I wish that I could say that I was not an overweight, DVD watching, fantasy living old person but I am . How did it all happen . I worked hard all my life to raise my children. I was a single Mom having never found the right man I gave up looking and took care of my children. It was hard keep it together. My mother help a little after her second husband died. She came and lived with me so I could work longer and harder to get the bills paid . I missed a lot of my children life being on the road as a photographer but we did not starve. As I think back maybe I should have looked harder for a mate instead of give up . I will talk later about why I gave up on relationships for now know that I did . This is a start,a begin to get on paper how I feel about my life. It is a secret that I am keeping from those who know me so I can be candied here and speak the truth without them knowing what is really going on in my brain . I may at a later date let them know but for know it is my secret ...I want to talk to you in the next few days and weeks straight from my heart ..I am going to unload here and maybe that will be good and maybe not. For a while we will be talking about me as honestly as I can . This is a start of someting new for Sober on the Beach but it is a new year.Let the year begin ...Mamaisan

Posted by sym3540 at 8:45 AM EDT | Post Comment | Permalink
Updated: Monday, 3 April 2006 12:15 PM EDT

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