Tuesday, 12 April 2005

Step Two
Topic: alcoholism
The second step in AA read "Came to believe that a power greater then ourselves could restore us to sanity" Every alcoholic will tell you of the insane things that they did while drinking. How many times do we say to ourselves I will not drink again after a bad bout with booze only to started up again later that day . For me there was a couple of small children I was cheating out of a good mother . Why would I put them in danger by drinking and driving with then in the car I did not know . I thought I had a belief in a God of my understanding..What I did not realizes how much of my life I ruled and how little I trusted this higher power to do for me .A belief that was as empty of spirit as the Church I attended. What I found I need for me was a far more personal God. I had to trusted God to take away the insanity of this disease One Day at a Time. I had to learn to live in the NOW no matter what happen . I started by saying Please in the morning and Thank You at night...There was a picture on the wall of one of the meeting that I attended .It was a small kitten hang on to a branch of a tree for dear life . That was me in the beginning and even today when life gives me life I see the kitten holding on and I picture hands of my god holding me up..One last thing I will not tell you what your higher power should be I will only say it should be something in which you can believe in . If you have no belief then believe the the power of good in the group of alcoholics will help you.....

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Monday, 11 April 2005

If You are young and a drunk ... Check this out
Koren Zailckas This a quote right of the dryblog page ""The life of a young drunk is not a continuous fall into the pit of abject alcohol abuse. It is a herky-jerky evolution. You slip, you trip, and you tumble into the habit of drinking when you are afraid, or enraged, or heartsick, and every so often, you hit a ledge from which you can see how deep into dependence you are. Every so often, you feel so lost in the hollow of your own need that you decide to try to hoist yourself out of it."
- Koren Zailckas, from her book 'Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood'" She will be on a Show tonightCocktails at 5 International listener check your time Addiction Talk Show Live Online Monday
From 5-6 pm Pacific Time; 6-7 pm Mountain;
7-8 pm Midwest; 8-9 pm Eastern Canada & US
(International listeners, see the Time Converter below):..Why did I put this up because it is very important to hear the young speak or maybe because I was a young girl just like her with similar but different story's

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Sunday, 10 April 2005

Let talk about the frist step
Topic: alcoholism
This will be the first of twelve Blog where I will talk about the step in AA and what they mean to me. The first step says "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol ...That our lives had become unmanageable".Nobody like to admitted they are powerless .We all think that we have the power to control our lives. It is hard to believe that a substance that I put in a glass was controlling me and causing me all these problems .I was a young drinker and I got into a lot of trouble . The first time someone talked to me about my drinking I was a senor in Hight School just 19yrs and running with an older crowd.I did not hear a word she was saying not really . I told her I did but what did she know so I got drunk once in a while so what . It would be 11 more years before I would really hear anyone. I was thirty when I stop drink in 1975 . I was a drinker that could go for long periods and not drink but when I did look out . What got me the most was why I could not drink like a normal person socially . I really hated what happen to me and what I did when I was drunk . A friend of mine had gone to AA only 6mos earlier and one day on the beach she said for me to take this test .. Well I failed of course.. It was a few weeks later after a really bad night I asked her if I could go with her to her meeting .. I had to admit that I was powerless and I did not like it but I did not want to drink either . As I sat in the meeting everyone was talking I realized that they were just like me. If normal people are purple then Alcoholics are green . It hard being green but green is what I was and I was never going to be purple .. Most of us give a right arm to be purple after 29yr I am grateful to be green

Posted by sym3540 at 5:38 PM EDT | Post Comment | Permalink
Updated: Tuesday, 12 April 2005 2:42 PM EDT

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Saturday, 9 April 2005

This is one of my most favorite links
Mood:  happy
I know this link is on the link page but It is so full of good stuff I just want to Post a Thanks for what he does .It has everything you needWhat a great site

Posted by sym3540 at 5:39 PM EDT | Post Comment | Permalink
Updated: Saturday, 9 April 2005 5:44 PM EDT

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Friday, 8 April 2005

INTO EACH LIFE THEIR IS SUN SHINE AND RAIN
Mood:  bright
Topic: staying sober
The rain in my live, I seem to remember better then I do the sunshine .It's a character defect. I've work on it all my sobriety especially in time when life is not going well . I forget all the sunshine in my life. The sun shine in this picture is my son girl friends grandchild (She is a very young grandmother.). That I treat like she was my grand baby.. This child has had 3 open heart surgery . She is a miracle to be here and just look at her smile. When I feel like life has given me more then I can handle.. I try and find something that make me smile . She does !

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Thursday, 7 April 2005

A quite place
Mood:  lyrical
Today I am bring to you a quite it place ... a place where you can just let you mind go and be quite.. The photo is at water side not far from my home ..I wanted to share one of my quite places with you today Take five to reflection

Posted by sym3540 at 10:02 PM EDT | Post Comment | Permalink
Updated: Saturday, 9 April 2005 4:51 PM EDT

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Tuesday, 5 April 2005

Father Martin
Mood:  happy
Topic: staying sober
I just read a blog which reminded me of something that happened to me 29years ago ..I was about 1yr sober at the time and a catholic priest was going to speak in the area ..Everyone was going to see him for it was said he really helped a lot ..I was new and did what my sponsor said so she and I was off to hear him speak .. I have to say as a speaker he was one of the best .He touched my heart .. There was a party after at one of our AA friends home and he came . I remember him sitting next to me and tell me if I let go and let God the every thing would be OK .. Things at the time were pretty bad ... Did things get better?? Yes and no but what I will say is that every step of the way my higher power was there and I stayed sober

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Monday, 4 April 2005

I love when I find a solution
Mood:  happy
Topic: staying sober
If you say to God "God grant me the serenity to except the thing I can not change and change the things I can .. I should know that there would be a solution ..Maybe not what I thought it would be but it would be a solution as he see it .. Here is his solution to putting a counter on the page ..It also uses the old links I had for the old page I love it ...
Front Page for Sober on the Beach

Posted by sym3540 at 6:09 PM EDT | Post Comment | Permalink

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Confused
Mood:  not sure
Topic: staying sober
I have another web site on Tirpod that I have complete control over how it looks Hey Yo a Tribute to Scott Hall..If I want to add a pic here or there I can but on this blog I am limited to what I can do or maybe I should say I haven"t figure out how to change it yet. The source code does look like htlm when I pull off the web put in the advance changes it does not... I love to have control over my life and when I don't it frustrate me.. In truth we never have control over anything it is an illusion I know but it is an illusion that make me feel secure .. I know in reality that MY HIGHER POWER is the only one that is in control and not me ....But some time I still like the illusion... So today I am say God grant me serenity and turn this over to God

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Saturday, 2 April 2005

Late Saturday Nite
Mood:  hug me
Topic: staying sober
It is late Saturday night and I have just spent the whole day with My grandson Cody . He is the only child of my daughter and unless she adopt one he will be her one and only. He is a great joy to me even thou he is a boy who act like a 10yr old should,sometime loud, silly and very hyper .... He love to play video games just like his uncle does . My 36yr old son who says his only addictions are his games and his computer... Cody is alway asking me to call his uncle to find out what the latest cheat are for his newest game.
Today it was my turn to find those cheats so he can get threw the game....He like to make the game easier so he can do it without to much trouble.He has great eye and hand skills better then my son..(that come form him)but sometime the game frustrate him.... I sometimes would like to look up a cheat to make my life easier.I want to enter into some secret spot a six or seven letter code that would give me more money or less weight or what every it is I need that day..... Maybe the only cheat I have to let go and let God.....

Posted by sym3540 at 11:55 PM EST | Post Comment | Permalink
Updated: Sunday, 3 April 2005 12:01 AM EST

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